Toddler

Go where you will this weekend; just don’t move your car or the pride people will steal your space.

The Art of William Steig

See the career highlights of the man responsible for Pete’s a Pizza, and the original Shrek at this fascinating exhibit of Steig’s drawings, New Yorker covers, and other doodles.

When: Ongoing daily through 9/7 (museum is closed Wednesday); Age 7+; Free with paid admission (Free-$10).

Where: Contemporary Jewish Museum, 736 Mission Street (between Third and Fourth Streets), San Francisco, 415-655-7800, thecjm.org.

38th Annual San Francisco LGBT Pride Celebration

The big parade starts moving down Market Street at 10:30 a.m. Sunday; hunker down early to get a good spot and once you’ve gotten an eyeful, move on to the afterparty at the Civic Center for food, music, vendor booths, and fun. If the crowd scene gets too hectic, drop in to the Family Garden for gentle kiddie fun: face-painting, games, arts and crafts, and the like.

When: Sun., 6/29, noon-7pm; All ages; Free.

Where: Parade goes from Market and Beale Streets to Market and Eighth Streets; Civic Center party is between Market, Van Ness, Leavenworth, and Turk Streets; (Family Garden is at Larkin and Grove); 415-864-0831; sfpride.org.

Peter & the Pirate

If your child has gotten bitten by the pirate bug, bring him to the San Francisco pier to meet Peter, Captain Bootleg, and Peter’s sea lion pal, Saline D. Ion, in this original maritime musical. Kids are invited to sing and dance with the cast.

When: Ongoing Saturdays and Sundays, 6/28-8/31 with shows at 11:30am and 1pm; All ages; Free-$15.95.

Where: Pier 39, Beach Street (at The Embarcadero), San Francisco, 415-433-3939, peterandthepirate.com.

Mrs. Grossman’s Company Store Annual Warehouse Store

Few local parents realize that Mrs. Grossman — she of the long, skinny sticker sheets that are sold in just about every toy store and pharmacy in America — is practically a local, and once a year the Petaluma warehouse sells deeply discounted stickers that make the sale worth the drive. No strollers allowed during the sale so leave very small kids at home and just bring the walking sticker freaks.

When: Fri., 6/27, 9am-5:30pm; Age 3+; Free.

Where: Mrs. Grossman’s Company Store, 3810 Cypress Drive (at South McDowell Boulevard), Petaluma, 800-429-4549, mrsgrossmans.com.

If you haven’t been by the Kinokuniya Bookstore in Japantown lately, you may not be aware that the store has beefed up its toy section, making the store a sublime place to shop for a birthday or shower gift. Just imagine the look of delight on a child’s face when she opens a box to find a tiny reproduction of a Mid-century Modern chair from the Reina Design Interior Collection! Actually, she should be grateful, the little brat, the things are all-but-unavailable online, sold out everywhere. But I digress.

Perhaps Princess would prefer the smiling, round Domino wooden figures or banks from You&I Toys, or the intense expression on the face of the Nara Yoshitomo-designed rolling dog toy from French toy makers Vilac. And surely no one could resist the pocket-size Sonny Angel Mini Figures, which come in Vegetable, Fruit, and Animal sets. You’ll be the only guest at the party to bring kewpie dolls with onions and cabbages on their heads, imagine!

All joking aside, all this stuff is pretty hard to find, even online, and to have it arrayed before you at the bookstore is pretty delicious. If the selection at Kinokuniya were bigger, the toy section would even rival that of the SFMOMA MuseumStore. And that’s saying something.

The Kinokuniya Bookstore’s San Francisco branch is located at 1581 Webster Street (at Post Street) in the Kintetsu Mall in Japantown, San Francisco. Call 415-567-7625 or visit bookweb.kinokuniya.co.jp.

Puppet shows, county fairs, star shows and a chance to let trained professionals wiggle and strap your car seat into submission.
Zanzibar Puppets present Cinderella

Extraordinary puppets, a classic story, and a swanky venue. Drag out the velvet dresses for this one.

When: Sat., 6/21, 11am, 1pm, and 3pm; Ages 3+; $15-25.

Where: Harry Denton’s Starlight Room in the Sir Francis Drake Hotel, 450 Powell St. (at Sutter St.), San Francisco, 415-391-8619, zanzibarpuppets.com.

Alameda County Fair

Watch the pig races, join the pie-eating contest, and take a chance on the whirling rides — will your kid throw up cotton candy and corn dogs? It’s all part of the fun at this old fashioned fair. Admission is free for kids under 12 on Fridays and always free for kids under 6.

When: Fri. 6/20 to Sun. 7/6, 11am-10pm Mon.-Thu., 10am-10pm Fri.-Sun.; All ages; Free-$10.

Where: Alameda County Fairgrounds, 4501 Pleasanton Avenue, Pleasanton, 925-426- 7600, alamedacountyfair.com.

Lake Chabot’s 125th Anniversary Free Family Fun Day

The venerable planetarium/science center throws itself an anniversary party with admission, movies, free planetarium shows, and special space games, all free. Design a rocket, play space bingo, and kibbiz with Bill Nye the Science Guy.

When: Sat., 6/21, 10am-6pm; All ages; Free.

Where: Lake Chabot Space & Science Center, 10000 Skyline Blvd. (at Redwood Road), Oakland; 510-336-7300, chabotspace.org.

CPMC BabySteps Kick-Off Event

Oh, you got the carseat in your car — but is it in properly? Professionals give it a check at this launch party for a new California Pacific Medical Center parenting networking site. You can also get toys tested for toxic lead levels, eat a free healthy lunch, and enjoy a storytime and face painting for the kiddies.

When: Sun., 6/22, 12pm-2pm; All ages; Free.

Where: Fisher Family Hall in the Jewish Community Center, 3200 California St. (at Presidio St.), San Francisco, cpmcbabysteps.org.

Fleet Week isn’t until October, but I’m sure you can find some excuse to lay out the long green for the Lidia sailor pants by San Francisco clothing company Ses Petites Mains.

Based in Noe Valley, Ses Petites Mains was launched by designer Beth Miles, who clearly has an eye both for fine fabric and just-so details. Lines are simple and classic; buttons are heavy and lustrous; colors are muted enough that everything in the store seems to go together.

And oh, the fabrics. Running your hands over a rack of Ses Petites Mains selections may just send you into fabric ecstasy, so easily can you imagine the silky cottons and pliable linens caressing your skin. Too bad you’ll have to settle for buying clothes for your daughter instead.

Ses Petites Mains clothing is available at many clothing boutiques in the Bay Area, including Fiddlesticks, Mabuhay, and Delilah Crown in San Francisco, or at online stores like Orange Button.

Cinemark’s Summer Movie Clubhouse, ten weeks of bargain-basement-cheap film showings for kids, is probably an easier sell in cities where it’s actually hot in the summer. No one weathering a San Fran summer is dying to spend a couple of hours in an air-conditioned theater…although at least it’ll keep you off those windy playgrounds.

The weekly special engagements are $1 a throw or $5 for a card good for all showings, and take place at several Bay Area theaters, including San Francisco’s CineArts @ Empire in the West Portal. All of the screenings are revivals, a treat in a summer when the new kids’ movies all look like crap. The first movie is Annie. Just try to leave without getting It’s The Hard-Knock Life stuck in your head.

When: Tue., 6/17, 10am; All Ages; Free.

Where: CineArts @ Empire, 85 West Portal Ave. (at Vincente), San Francisco, 1-800-FANDANG, theater number 963, cinemark.com.

The sparkling, pristine new location of swimming school La Petite Baleen is finally open in the Presidio. No longer will San Fran parents have to haul their cranky children down to San Bruno or (ye Gods!) Half Moon Bay to get a crack at the fancy swimming school’s excellent instructors.

It’s not like there aren’t places in San Francisco to get swimming lessons. But with the notable exception of the pool at the JCC, local pools tend to be, well, kind of grotty, with suspicious dark spots on their bottoms, and extra-strength mold around the ladders. La Petite Baleen is brand-spankin’, well-appointed, nicely located and just plain nice. That said, it’s going to cost you — $85 a month for lessons in the San Francisco location.

Non-potty-trained swimmers are accepted, as young as two months, and as kids get older they move from splash-and-play sessions to more serious stroke drills.

La Petite Baleen is located at 933 Mason St. in the Presidio. For more information, call 866-896-3603 or visit swimlpb.com.

Don’t forget to bring Daddy breakfast in bed, now.

Northern California Pirate Festival

Go for the arrrgh of it, and enjoy pirate demos and performers, swordfighting, olde crafts and cannons a-blasting.

When: Sat. & Sun., 6/14-15; 10am-6pm; All ages; Free.

Where: Vallejo Waterfront, 401 Mare Island Way (at Capitol St.), norcalpiratefestival.com.

Stern Grove Music Festival

Get into the swing of things at the summer outdoor music festival as R&B/soul singers Booker T. Jones and Bettye Lavette perform in verdant Stern Grove. Bring a picnic and a blanket.

When: Ongoing, Sundays starting 6/15; 2pm; Free.

Where: Stern Grove, 19th Ave. (at Sloat Blvd), 415-252-6252, sterngrove.org.

Music For Families

Give Junior a taste for classical music at this special concert geared at young ones.

When: Sat., 5/14, 2pm; Age 4+; $7.50-54.

Where: Davies Symphony Hall, 201 Van Ness St. (at Grove St.), 415-864-6000, sfsymphony.org.

Cool Daddy-O

Celebrate Father’s Day in true hipster style by learning how to customize your bike, courtesy of the Shorty Fatz lowrider bike crew.

When: Sun., 6/15, 12-5pm; Age 4+; Free with museum admission,

Where: Oakland Museum of California, 1000 Oak St. (at 10th St.), Oakland, 510-238-2200, museumca.org.

We have festival fever, film in the park, and cannons set on “fire.”
San Francisco Ethnic Dance Festival

A dizzying range of dance styles take a bow during this month-long fiesta. Korean shaman rituals? Mexican marimba? Indian Kathak dance? All here. Special family events occur each Friday afternoon in various venues in S.F. and Oakland, beginning this Friday with a demonstration of Shodiona, a Tajik “dance of happiness” at 3pm in the Children’s Center at the Main Library.

When: Beginning 6/7 and ongoing through 6/29, most performances are Sat. 2pm and 8pm and Sun. 2pm; All ages; Free-$44. Family events occur Fridays; see website for more information.

Where: Various venues in San Francisco and Oakland, but most performances take place at the Palace of Fine Arts Theatre, 3301 Lyon St. (at Bay St.), San Francisco, 415-392-4400, worldartswest.org.

Yerba Buena Gardens Festival

The exhaustive five-month (May-October) arts party is already in swing, offering a huge variety of free music, theater, dance, educational and children’s programs. Of particular interest to parents in June: the Caterpillar Puppets this Friday 6/6 and Saturday 6/28 at 11am and 12:15pm; brilliant physical comedian/musician The Unique Derique Friday and Saturday, 6/13-14, 11am and 12:15pm; and the California Sing-Along, folksy songs about California’s history, on Friday 6/20.

When: Ongoing through 10/26; most performances occur Thu.-Sun.; Times vary; All ages; Free.

Where: Yerba Buena Gardens, Mission St. (between 3rd and 4th Streets), San Francisco, 415-543-1718; ybgf.org.

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon at Washington Square Park

Bring your martial-arts lovers to this free showing of Ang Lee’s groundbreaking fairytale. Spread a blanket (no chairs are allowed), bring a picnic, but leave the littlest ones at home: Commonsense Media recommends this film for kids aged 12 and up due to violence.

When: Sat., 6/7, 8pm; Age 12+; Free.

Where: Washington Square Park, Columbus St. (at Union St.), San Francisco, 415-465-FILM, sfneighborhoodtheater.org.

Civil War Days on Angel Island

Just the ferry ride over to Angel Island (and the view of San Francisco’s skyline!) will blow your mind. Then watch history come to life as Camp Reynolds, a former Civil War recruiting post for Union soldiers, plays host to musket drills, marches, and historians who will explain the details of making rope, signaling with flags, baking Civil War-style, and other wartime skills.

When: Sat., 6/7, 11am-3:30pm; Age 4+; Free (Optional tram ride to Camp Reynolds is $5).

Where: Camp Reynolds at Angel Island; accessible by the Tiburon, San Francisco, and Alameda/Oakland Ferries; see angelisland.org for transit information; 415-435-5390; angelisland.org.

San Francisco is not a town known for its fabulous beaches. Yeah, sure, there’s Ocean Beach and Baker Beach, but if the sleeper waves don’t kill you, the freezing cold water will.

All that changed for parents with little kids when Crissy Field was renovated, and sand strewn at the northernmost shoreline of the Presidio. Suddenly what was a barren wasteland became a tiny (less than a mile long), jewel-like beach, with mild, gentle waves thanks to its sheltered Bay location. The area’s so small and compact that parents can just throw down a blanket and let the kids wander; on any sunny day the beach is crammed with dogs, moms, and preschoolers, all wading in the water, digging in the sand, and taking in the fantastic view of the Golden Gate Bridge.

Parking at the Marshall lot (Marshall Street at Mason Street) is free and just steps from the beach; restrooms and the Warming Hut are conveniently located nearby if you should need to visit the facilities or grab a snack. Best of all, your exhausted children will probably fall happily asleep in the car on the way home. And isn’t that what outings are all about?

San Franciscans with fond memories of Playland at the Beach (or who just get a thrill out of circusy old San Francisco) will no doubt want to make a trek to the brand-spanking-new museum, Playland-Not-at-the-Beach.

The El Cerrito museum pulls together artifacts from many private collections including that of proprietor Richard Tuck, who rescued many curios from the garages of original Playland neighbors. Highlights include fascinating historical photographs, exhibits spotlighting circus sideshow acts like the Fiji Mermaid, vintage movies of Playland and the Sutro baths, sculptures of Playland’s coasters, and other weird and wonderful stuff, like a miniature circus diorama that took 50 years to carve. Playland also has a room full of creaky old pinball/arcade machines, all free with the price of admission so you needn’t play quarter-dispensing machine for your children.

One more thing Playland-Not-at-the-Beach has — its very own Laughing Sal. But wait (you may be asking yourself, as I did)–isn’t Laughing Sal currently terrifying children at the Musee Mechanique? Ah, it turns out that Playland at the Beach’s Laughing Sal was only one of many. There’s another one at the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk. Who cares about authenticity, anyway? Laughing Sal laughs and stares at you with her dead soulless eyes as your frightened children cling to you. What more could you want?

Like a preview? SFGate has a nice video of the place.

Playland-Not-at-the-Beach is located at 10979 San Pablo Avenue in El Cerrito, and is open by appointment only, Saturdays from 10am-5pm, and some Sundays. Admission is $5. To make a reservation for a visit, call 510- 232-4264 ext. #25 or visit playland-not-at-the-beach.org.